ELDR blogs

Fort Bragg, Fayetteville, and Military Heroes

Mon, 24 Aug 2009 13:51:53 -0400

God bless our U. S. soldiers, past, present and future. That was my thought as I recently toured Fort Bragg in Fayetteville, North Carolina, the nation's largest military installation based on personnel, and the world's largest airborne facility - 160,832 acres. In 1952, it became home to the Green Berets and is home to the 82nd Airborne Division, the XVIII Airborne Corps and the Golden Knights, the U. S. Army's Parachute Team.

Martin Sandler

82nd Airborne Memorial Museum

The onsite 82nd Airborne Division War Memorial Museum has a huge collection of military memorabilia from World War I to the present. World War II military aircraft are on the grounds. The intriguing onsite JFK Special Warfare Museum delves into Special Operations units from World War II and forward.

I experienced a patriotic surge as I watched young uniformed soldiers marching around the Fort Bragg campus and as I ate lunch alongside them in the Officers Club (a dining hall). They are surely our American heroes. Fort Bragg is like a self-contained city, with its own golf course, which is open to the public.

At Fort Bragg's Sicily Drop Zone, according to a jump schedule, visitors can observe paratroopers' airborne training. The JFK Memorial Chapel's stained glass windows are dedicated to Special Forces and here also is a monument John Wayne gave to them for their help when he filmed "The Green Berets." Another Fort Bragg monument is "Iron Mike," the powerful bronze statue dedicated to the Airborne Soldier.

Martin Sandler

Airborne & Special Ops Museum

I have never seen a more spectacular military museum than the Airborne & Special Ops Museum located in downtown Fayetteville: realistic uniformed mannequins, sound effects, a Pitch, Roll & Yaw Motion Simulator ride, war sets, helicopters, jeeps, a C-47 "Skytrain" airplane suspended from the ceiling, a rare CG-4A glider from WW II, and a Sheridan tank so big that I'm told that part of the museum had to be built around it.

I was a toddler during World War II, so my knowledge of it comes from books and movies. I saw "Darby's Rangers," starring James Garner, "Merrill's Marauders," starring Jeff Chandler, and "Patton," starring George C. Scott, but at these military museums, the three men are spotlighted and the movies go from reel life to real life.

I was surprised to find an exhibit about Martha Raye. Because she dedicated herself to entertaining our troops overseas and she used her nursing skills to assist surgeons impromptu in the field during World War II, she received special permission to be buried at Fort Bragg. Fayetteville itself is full of surprises, like the fact that it was named for the Marquis de Lafayette, who visited there in 1825.

In the early 1700s, when it was first settled by Scottish immigrants, it had a different name. The Museum of the Cape Fear, Fayetteville's regional history museum, chronicles the arrival, influence and customs of pioneers bearing names like MacDonald, MacRae, McLaughlin, MacPherson, MacGregor, Smith.

More surprises: A historical marker citing the Fayetteville spot where Babe Ruth hit his first professional home run in 1914; the 97-acre Cape Fear Botanical Garden's farmhouse and outbuildings depicting 19th-century farm life, and its gigantic (Brobdingnagian) pair of eyeglasses at the Lilliput Labyrinth in the children's garden.

Surprise! A Fayetteville murder mystery. Did Ann K. Simpson poison her husband in 1849 by putting arsenic into his dessert in the oval-shaped dining room of their boarding house? Ignoring damaging testimony, a jury acquitted her. It seems she later was found guilty of murdering her next husband, and she was executed.

Martin Sandler

Oval Ballroom--Ann's Boarding House

Ann's boarding house (ca. 1808) is gone, but the oval-shaped room is now a free-standing building, the Oval Ballroom. It and two furnished homes (ca. 1800) comprise Heritage Square, a local attraction. The city has several heritage trails: Civil War; Gaelic Beginnings; Religious Freedom; Patriots Past and Present; American Independence; etc. Fayetteville lives up to its motto: History, Heroes & A Hometown Feeling. (Contact the Fayetteville Area Convention & Visitors Bureau at 1-888-NC CHARM.)

Roberta Sandler is an award-winning writer/author. Her newest book is A Brief Guide to Florida's Monuments and Memorials, published by University Press of Florida. She and her husband live in Wellington, FL.

Charleston: The Lure of the Low Country

Tue, 28 Jul 2009 12:43:25 -0400

One of my favorite musicals is 1776, not only because American history fascinates me, but because of one extraordinary song sung unforgettably by John Collum: "Molasses to Rum to Slaves." Collum portrayed Edward Rutledge, a South Carolina signer of the Declaration of Independence.

Roberta Sandler

Wrought ironwork at John Rutledge House

It delighted me to find, during my recent first visit to Charleston, that Edward Rutledge's home is here and so is his older brother John's home, now a bed-and-breakfast called John Rutledge House Inn. John was Governor of South Carolina, a signer of the U.S. Constitution and the second Chief Justice of the Supreme Court.

The exterior of John Rutledge's house, built ca. 1763, features gorgeous wrought ironwork, a popular design element in Charleston. History and charm cling to Charleston like necklaces of moss embellishing graceful live oaks, but when I think of this Low Country city, I'll remember the intricate verdigris wrought iron step rails, posts, balconies and fencing that repeats itself in front of homes and buildings.

I'll also remember the often-exquisite architecture of structures like the boutique Mills House Hotel, built in 1853 and epitomizing luxurious southern hospitality, and the majestic white steeple rising from St. Michael's Episcopal Church, which was erected in 1761. George Washington worshipped there during his tour of the South in 1791 and John Rutledge is buried on the church grounds.

Charleston is known as the Holy City, thanks to its ubiquitous houses of worship, several of which date to the 1700s. Among them is Congregation Beth Elohim. It is the birthplace of American Reform Judaism, America's fourth oldest synagogue and considered to be one of our nation's finest examples of Greek Revival architecture.

The grand architecture continues with majestic houses rising along The Battery overlooking the Cooper River and featuring cozy side-porches/verandas that residents refer to as piazzas. Horse-drawn carriages transport tourists across cobblestone streets; plaques identify the relentless lineup of historic homes; park statues and monuments honor local notables, including Andrew Jackson's mother, who lived in Charleston.

Roberta Sandler

Stately homes along Charleston's Battery

Few southern cities possess as much Colonial/Revolutionary War/Civil War heritage as Charleston. Open for tours are Heyward-Washington House, visited by George Washington and owned by Thomas Heyward Jr., a signer of the Declaration of Independence (later imprisoned by the British); Fort Sumter, where the Civil War began; also, Patriot's Point, home of the aircraft carrier Yorktown's Medal of Honor Museum.

Charleston is contradictory: lively and serene, modern and historic, sturdy and delicate, but the contradictions harmonize so beautifully. And oh, the splendor of the ante-bellum plantation homes, especially Middleton Place. This 1700s rice plantation on the winding Ashley River is a National Historic Landmark. It includes a stately mansion (now a house-museum) and what is touted as America's oldest landscaped gardens.

Symmetrical, verdant and vibrant, the gardens are lush, vast and tranquil, a perfect appendage to a plantation that reflects the often-breathtaking beauty of the Low Country.

Shopping at the Old City Market or the King Street boutiques; taking architecture, ghost, history or water tours; feasting on regional cuisine at the upscale Peninsula Grill on Market Street or innovative specialties at the casual Hominy Grill on Rutledge Avenue; strolling shaded streets rich with manicured homes and gardens -- Charleston's menu of attractions was too big to fit into my schedule. I plan to return - again and again.

For more information, contact the Charleston Area CVB at 1-800-774-0006.

If Not Now, When Do We Live Fully?

Fri, 26 Jun 2009 14:27:39 -0400

"Putting your own life/needs/emotions on hold can't be healthy for you," I told someone yesterday, and it reminds me of how often I find myself saying that.

A reader writes that she has a sexless and even touchless marriage, but can't support herself financially so she's staying. A male friend of mine in his sixties can't decide whether his current relationship is right for him, so he doesn't decide, he just goes along. A reader in his fifties will start exploring relationships after he moves. A woman says she will feel sexier after she loses weight. A couple hasn't had sex for years but won't see a therapist because they think they should figure it out on their own.

I often ask people of our age who have put their own happiness and passions on hold, "If not now, when?"

Courtesy Joan Price

Robert Rice

If you've read much of my blog, you know that I lost my beloved husband, Robert Rice, to cancer August 2008. He was an artist, a dancer, a thinker, and a teacher to all who knew him. As long as he could stand upright, he painted in his studio every day, creating amazing art, yet always striving for that elusive best painting -- maybe his next. He painted some of his most magnificent work in his last two years.

"Do you feel like you're living on borrowed time," I asked Robert one morning as he pulled on his paint-splattered jeans and sweater.

"I AM living on borrowed time," he told me. Then he kissed me and rushed off to tend his garden for a couple of hours before heading to the studio.

I'm making myself cry writing this, but I admired him (and admire him still) for always going towards his goals, his love for life and creativity, and his passion for love itself, even when he knew he was dying.

We all have a death sentence, we just don't know when it is. As we age, though, we get many reminders of our mortality, some subtle (aches in new places, parts that don't work 100% like they used to), some not subtle at all (a cancer diagnosis, a spinal or hip fracture, parts that don't work at all).

It seems to me that we have a responsibility to ourselves and to life itself to live fully, productively, and lovingly -- as long as we can.

As I reread this post, I realize that it's a lesson I have to relearn in my own life now as I emerge from the dark place of grief and make my way back to life, work, sunshine, and joy.

Thank you, Robert, for the lessons you taught me so well.

Joan Price is the author of Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty (http://www.joanprice.com/BetterThanExpected.htm). Please visit her sex & aging blog at http://www.betterthanieverexpected.blogspot.com.

The Economy is Down, Creativity is Up

Fri, 26 Jun 2009 13:58:14 -0400

It's everywhere. People are struggling and businesses are closing. Assumed to be the longest recession since World War II, the economy has faltered and sent tremors rippling down Wall Street, along Main Street and near you.

In such a somber environment, it is prime time for creativity to stand up and get noticed. And it's everywhere. People are reaching for new experiences, businesses are reinventing themselves and the light continues to shine bright on flexibility, change and imagination.

We are living the adage of "Necessity is the Mother of Invention". Spending less is the necessity; invention is a panorama of new avenues to explore and new solutions to deploy.

To save money, people are changing their ways. Sharon Kraynak, a salesperson at an art store in Philadelphia, responds to many new customers asking for information and advice about different products. Sharon observed, ‘They have decided not to go away on vacation so they want to do something creative at home instead. There is so much pressure to hold their jobs that this is a healthy release for them.'

Creative pursuits remain strong. Kathleen Lenkeit, 59, works for the state of California and knows about holding her job while maintaining her hobby of knitting. "The Governor furloughed us 2 days each month, for a 10% pay cut." says Kathleen "Now there's talk of a 3rd furlough day each month (with another 5% pay cut), so I'm trying to be conservative in what I'm buying. But, a gal's got to have her yarn and patterns to stay calm!'

Another crafter has turned ways of being frugal to her advantage. "I used to enjoy shopping for my craft supplies but when the economy took a nose dive, I changed my approach" says Joan Lobenberg, 74, "and now I enjoy integrating found objects in my work. There is no cost, the elements are unique and my work has generated lots of interest."

Interest in art has escalated. Museums in the western part of New York State have realized increased attendance and membership despite reduction of funds. And it is also in cities across the country.

"Rochester is a microcosm for the entire country," said Dewey Blanton, spokesman for the American Association of Museums in Washington, D.C. "Attendance has never been stronger because in tough times people rely on museums for respite and renewal. But attendance doesn't pay all the bills."

Struggling to pay bills is a big problem for many seniors so the education sector is getting creative. Colleges and universities are growing their courses and workshops to adjust to an increased demand by unemployed older adults needing career support.

Retirement, once within grasp, is now years away.

In 2008, Maryland's Anne Arundel Community College had almost 14,000 adult students aged 50 and older. In response to this growing demographic, they have developed more resources to help them. "We're getting a lot more requests from people who are going back to work," said Terry Portis, director of AACC's Center on Aging. "As a result, we're trying to beef up our career counseling area."

With these financial social changes, comfort zones have shifted. The new imperative is to think outside the box, adapt to new turf, relish new challenges and find reasons to be grateful.

Reframing, the process of looking at something in a different way from different angles, is a helpful technique to navigate through this tough economy. It's having a new lens to generate a vision of opportunities to survive, and even thrive, in this economy.

"The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them."

- Albert Einstein

To read more from Judith: Therapy Times: Handcraft kits on the left column

I Celebrate My Life

Tue, 16 Jun 2009 19:48:07 -0400

Finally at 74, I’m happy with my life and ready to celebrate it.

For longer than I care to remember, I’ve seen my life as a failure. I was disappointed with what I’d accomplished, and longed for an event that would justify my existence. Recently I’ve found myself “praying” for the grace to accept and be happy with the life I have lived. And today, upon awakening from a long sleep, I realized that boon had been granted.

I’ve always liked Buckminster Fuller’s motto, "Small Is Beautiful." I can see my life that way. My wife, Marilyn, and I live in a small house we sometimes refer to as a Hobbit house. Yet it is charming, warm, and we both find great pleasure and contentment in what we have done with it. We took a run-down little place and make it into a delightful cottage in the city, complete with a magical garden, in truth more a shady grove that songbirds and squirrels play in.

Marilyn’s artistry encompasses living things. She uses the
earth as her canvas and plants as her palette. She also tends a small allotment garden in High Park that has become her sacred place to touch into the earth and keep alive her farming heritage.

I have a small log cabin on the Big East River in Muskoka. It is my own sacred place, fulfilling my childhood dream to live in the woods. Mine is the quintessential cabin, with a large stone fireplace at one end. Logs honey-gold from age. Wood stove, sleeping loft, wind in the trees, rush of water, sunlight pouring in through rustic framed windows.

Even the occasional late-night call from a wolf pack baying at the moon.

I have a small circle of good friends, lifelong friends. Do I need to mention that the one thing not small in my life is my love, returned in abundance by my wife?

Yet there is more. How often I’ve bemoaned my lack of special gifts! No musical talent, no artistic vision, limited athletic ability… But I do have one faculty I’ve been blessed with: a knack for relating to others. I find myself easily and quickly feeling a simple, direct affection for people.

More often than not I seem to send out warmth to everyone I come in contact with, be it a stranger on the street or a guest in our home, that makes them feel good about themselves and glad to be alive.

Most of my life people have felt easy in my company. It’s a quality I was born with, the same way I was born with a birthmark on my face. And so on this day, I celebrate myself.

Rome’s Romantic Treasure: Keats-Shelley House

Tue, 16 Jun 2009 05:55:27 -0400

In the summer of 1816, poet Lord Byron rented a villa on Lake Geneva in Switzerland. It rained

Martin Sandler

The Keats-Shelley House in Rome

for days. Byron was running out of ways to entertain his guests: fellow poet Percy Bysshe Shelley; Shelley's wife, Mary; and Mary's half-sister, Claire, who had had an affair with Byron and was now pregnant with his child.

"We will each write a ghost story," Lord Byron suggested. Only Shelley's wife took the suggestion seriously. She went to her room and began writing. THAT is how Mary Shelley wrote Frankenstein.

This delightful anecdote proves that although popular tourist attractions are enjoyable, it's sometimes the offbeat attractions that are more memorable. For Marty and me, this was especially true when we vacationed in Rome. We had visited the popular attractions and were ready to discover the unusual or lesser known.

Overlooking the Eternal City's world-famous Spanish Steps, there is a four-story yellow house that was built in 1725. This is now the Keats-Shelley House because two rooms on the second floor became English poet John Keats' home from late 1820 until his death in early 1821 at the age of 26. The house, now a museum and library, preserves the memory of Keats and fellow poet Shelley, both of whom lived and died in Italy.

The Frankenstein anecdote is one of many morsels of trivia that are revealed inside the Keats-Shelley House. I admit that I knew nothing about either poet, nor did I have any great interest in their poems or those of other poets of the Romantic Age (1789-1837), but this house-museum's guided and self-guided tours provides a window into the lives and passions of Keats, Shelley and Lord Byron, and I found it fascinating.

Martin Sandler

Inside the Keats-Shelley House

In 1816, Keats wrote his first great poem, "On First Looking into Chapman's Homer." In 1819, he wrote "Ode to a Nightingale" and "Ode on a Grecian Urn." In 1820, Keats and his caregiver-friend Joseph Severn left England for Rome. Keats was now near death from Tuberculosis, the same disease that had claimed his mother and brother.

In the Severn Room, there are portraits of Keats and his brothers that Severn painted, along with portraits of Keats' fiancée, Fanny Brawne and Romantic poets Leigh Hunt and William Wordsworth. A life mask of Keats and first editions of his poems are on display.

Keats spent his final days in bed, his only diversion being a window view of the Spanish Steps and Bernini's boat-shaped Barcaccia fountain. The circa 1820 walnut "boat bed" in the Keats Room is a replica of the one Keats slept in. Keats' death mask rests near this bed.

Devastated by Keats' death, Shelley wrote the great elegy, Adonais. He had already been acclaimed for his Prometheus Unbound. Percy Shelley's death was also premature and tragic. He drowned in 1822 at age 30 when his boat was caught in a storm near Livorno. He and Keats are buried in Rome's Protestant Cemetery.

Lord Byron's life story is more amusing. True, he died from a fever in 1824 when he was only 36, but beyond his fame for penning Childe Harold and Don Juan, Lord Byron was a notorious womanizer. I would describe him as a "pretty boy." Who knows how many of his illegitimate children were running around while spouting poetry?

The Salon in the Keats-Shelley House contains priceless artifacts: first editions, manuscripts, drawings, a sonnet about Keats handwritten by Oscar Wilde, an essay handwritten by Walt Whitman, a mask that Lord Byron wore to a Venetian Carnival and a letter written by Elizabeth Barrett Browning, who obviously adored Keats.

When I asked the curator, Catherine Payling, why she feels the house is important - especially for people who were never into poetry -- she had a simple but insightful answer: "This is a place of pilgrimage. Some people come here knowing that. Some people leave here knowing that."

Editor's note: The Happy Traveler has been named the 2009 Best Online Travel Blog by the Society of American Travel Writers' Atlantic-Caribbean Chapter. Over 155 entries were judged by the faculty of the Journalism Department at the University of North Carolina. Congratulations to Roberta and Martin.

Eleanor Faye: Ophthalmologist

Thu, 04 Jun 2009 08:30:20 -0400

When I came out of the elevator at the Lighthouse, I wasn't expecting a giant sign over the reception area reading "Eleanor E. Faye Low Vision Service." I shouldn't have been surprised. Faye has worked there since 1956 and is a pioneer in the rehabilitation of people who are visually impaired.

Greeting me warmly in her small, cluttered office, Faye told me about growing up in Hawaii, where her father was a sugar broker. Mail arrived by ship only twice a week and there was no transatlantic phone, so the isolated child read every book she could get her hands on. "My uncles all married school teachers, so they had me in their clutches," Faye recalls, smiling at the memory.

Three months after she arrived at Stanford University as one of two women in a class of 60. Pearl Harbor was bombed. "They gathered us together in a room and said, ‘You are a different generation. You are a war generation, and you can't just sit around and be housewives." To her English professor's regret, Faye went pre-med, eventually settling on ophthalmology and becoming the first female Resident in Ophthalmology at the Manhattan Eye and Ear Hospital. Faye then entered private practice and began offering low vision therapy. The field appealed because it involved "people who were neglected, who'd been told, ‘There's nothing we can do for you.'" she explains. "We made house calls, we went out and brought people in. That's why my name's on the wall, because I built up all this rehab."

Faye also turned out to be an excellent surgeon, which she loved because "you do wonderful things for people. They get their sight back, and sometimes a new lease on their lives." Her youngest patient was three hours old, her oldest age 103. During her career she mastered astonishing advances in areas like cataract surgery. "We used to have a long thin knife that we stuck through the eye, and sawed up to open the eye and pull the cataract out. Now we insert an ultrasonic probe into a 3-mm incision, vibrate the cataract out, and the person goes to lunch with implants in. Now they're doing bifocal implants, which is new since I retired."

Faye stopped performing from surgery in 2002, at age 79. "One day, after a very successful cataract operation on a woman, I was walking on 64th Street towards my office and I suddenly said to myself, ‘That's the last case I'm going to do.'" Leading up to the decision was the occasional query from a patient asking whether she was still operating. "The underlying question of course related to competency and age, and no one can conceal their age any more. Also, I can remember World War II, which is a giveaway," she observes wryly. "I had a stellar career, and I thought, ‘I'm going out when I'm still on top.'"

Ever since, Faye has been happily assisting her associate and taking care of her patients' post-operative needs. Aside from moving her first appointment of the day up to 10:00 AM, the doctor's schedule remains unaltered: two days at the Lighthouse and three seeing patients in her office, never spending less than 30 minutes with each. Faye lives off investments because her practice barely breaks even, largely because she often undercharges or charges nothing at all. Sometimes she regrets being so busy, but she can't even imagine retiring. "I keep people going, I really do, and I take pride in that," she declares. The ophthalmologist has had many of her patients for 40 or 50 years, "and when they ask if I'm thinking of retiring, they're glad that I say no."

Faye has no doubt that she's more competent than ever, not just because of her medical knowledge but because she knows what questions to ask. "Every person with an eye problem has a story. So I do psychotherapy too - my version of it - which is learning everything that they care to tell me or that I can get out of them." She doesn't figure that her age affects the way patient and colleagues treat her, perhaps "because I don't consider myself old. Mentally I feel maybe in my early 60's - older middle age." So much for ageism. As for sexism, Faye sees herself as going after what she wanted rather than blazing a trail: "I worked hard and I did my share. I enjoy the company of men, and I truly never felt that I stood out as a woman." Never married, she describes herself as "very fortunate in my relationships" and is glad to have been spared the struggles of her married-with-children friends trying to juggle it all. "I've really led the most interesting and exciting life, and I have people close to me."

What's the doctor's one regret? That she didn't learn Spanish, because "it is so useful." One more? That she couldn't study Ancient Greek in high school, in 1936. The Latin teacher was game to teach Faye and her friend, " but when we asked the principal, he said, ‘You can't. You will overstretch your brains.'" Faye's been overstretching her brain ever since, and thousands of visually impaired Americans have reaped the benefits.

You can see Faye's picture at http://www.stayingvertical.com/?q=node/133, and hear her describing the encounter with New York socialite Aida de Costa Breckenridge that got her in the door at Manhattan Eye and Ear Hospital, and how it feels to "keep people going."

Houston has Bragging Rights

Fri, 15 May 2009 14:07:54 -0400

Texans say they have bragging rights, and maybe Houstonians deserve that claim. NASA's Manned Spacecraft Center ("Houston, we have a problem!") is here, as are the Astros, but so are loads of attractions, either popular or offbeat, as I discovered.

Houston, first capital of the Republic of Texas, was founded in 1836 and named for General Sam Houston, the Republic's first president. I had pictured Houston as oil wells and 10-gallon hats, so I was surprised by the city's fine art museums, its resident symphony, opera, ballet and theater company, and its 17-block theater and museum district. Oil isn't the only thing that's refined, here!

At the Buffalo Soldiers National Museum, I learned how these soldiers earned their nickname. In 1867, noting the fierce fighting ability of the 10th Cavalry (U. S. Colored Troops), Cheyenne warriors respectfully called these black soldiers wild buffalos. The museum's artifacts and exhibits illustrate the hardships and bravery of black men and women who served in American wars and military campaigns.

Glenwood Cemetery isn't on most visitors' Must See lists, but I went to this "romantic cemetery park" to see the graves of Howard Hughes and actress Gene Tierney. Who can forget Tierney in "Laura" and "The Ghost and Mrs. Muir"? Tierney's husband was oilman Howard Lee. A movie camera is etched into her gravestone in the Lee plot.

Considering the magnitude of Howard Hughes' empire, I expected to see him buried in an elaborate, ornate mausoleum, but instead, his grave is behind a simple low wall fronted by a row of torches. Beautiful live oak trees dot Glenwood's 65 acres overlooking Buffalo Bayou. Among the gravesites, I spotted this obelisk: "Peter W. Gray, born in Fredericksburg, VA December 12, 1819. Fell asleep October 3, 1874."

Robert Sandler

Bayou Bend, Ima Hogg House

Bayou Bend was the home of Houston collector and philanthropist Ima Hogg. Her father, a Texas Governor, must have had a cruel sense of humor when he named her. She was pretty. Her 1920s Georgian-Spanish Creole-style house is home to Houston's Museum of Fine Arts, and drips with fabulous paintings and furnishings. The ornamental and Italian Renaissance-style gardens are stunning. Docents give guided tours.

On the flip side is the 1939 Beer Can House. The exterior is covered with 70,000 crushed or hammered beer cans that resemble aluminum siding. I don't know what possessed the house's owner to do this, but its strangeness makes it a tourist attraction.

Another strange but intriguing attraction is the National Museum of Funeral History, whose exhibits and artifacts include vintage hearses and replicas of John F. Kennedy's and Abraham Lincoln's coffins. There's nothing strange about Sam Houston Park, though. The park, an outdoor museum, showcases 19th-century buildings, including the 1850 Nicholas-Cherry-Rice house, once owned by the founder of Rice University.

Another notable park is Emancipation Park. Texas didn't enforce the freeing of slaves until June 19, 1865, so in 1866, black residents commemorated the event with a festive celebration, "Juneteenth," at the park. The "Juneteenth" annual holiday has since spread across the United States.

Robert Sandler

Base of San Jacinto Monument

I admit I was fascinated by the San Jacinto Monument and Museum, part of the San Jacinto Battleground Historical Complex. The monument, honoring all those who fought for Texas independence, is the world's tallest memorial column, 15 feet taller than the Washington Monument.

The museum is in the monument's base and has about 2,500 artifacts from the Mexican war and the Republic of Texas - swords, Santa Ana's diamond-encrusted knee buckle, Sam Houston's pocket watch, etc.

Across from the monument, the battleship Texas, commissioned in 1914, is now a memorial ship. It saw action in World War I, in Normandy and on Okinawa. It was the first battleship to launch an aircraft. Those anti-aircraft guns are impressive! This is the only surviving dreadnought-class warship. An onboard tour guide relayed the ship's history as I explored from bow to stern.

Robert Sandler

Battleship Texas

I also took a walking tour of downtown's Texas Avenue, which is filled with architecturally distinctive buildings. Here, 55 historical markers unfold Houston's history beginning from 1839. It was more proof of how culturally, artistically and historically diverse Houston is and - by the way - how great the city's restaurants are.

If Houstonians want to brag, by all means, let them!

- Roberta Sandler is an award-winning writer/author. Her newest book is A Brief Guide to Florida's Monuments and Memorials, published by University Press of Florida. She and her husband live in Wellington, FL.

Herb and Dorothy

Mon, 04 May 2009 16:22:18 -0400

They did not plan to be rich or famous. After all, they both had long, quiet careers in the government.

He was a postal worker without a high school diploma and she was a librarian for the New York Public Library with a graduate degree. But Herb had an insatiable passion for art and Dorothy slid right under his wing.

Now, approximately 50 years after they met, the Vogels have amassed a vast and unique collection of American contemporary art, mostly minimalist, that has been donated to the National Gallery in Washington, DC. And they are still collecting.

How did they do it?

They lived frugally in a rent controlled apartment in New York City where they still live today. There are probably more live pets (cats, fish and turtles) than pieces of furniture. When a guest arrives, a plastic folding chair is extended gracefully but it will not stay extended too long.

Their apartment is small but packed, literally from floor to ceiling, with art. Having decided to live on one salary and purchase art with the other, every Saturday they went art shopping as others were doing their weekly food shopping.

They're a diminutive unassuming couple. So in the 1960s, it was somewhat unusual to see them romping around SOHO visiting galleries, artists and undeveloped loft spaces. Many artists became happily accustomed to seeing Herb and Dorothy and looked forward to selling their art so they could pay their rent.

The old adage "cash is king" worked. And at the end of the day, you could follow them on the subway or hailing a taxi carrying wrapped parcels of art back to their small apartment.

And so they developed friendships with many of these artists and had an advantage as a buyer. Once they were even given preliminary drawings of the Christo and Jean Claude project Valley Curtain in exchange for watching the artist's cat while they were away.

Sol Le Witt, Chuck Close, Richard Tuttle, Eva Hesse, Donald Judd and many others are in their 20th century collection and you can take a glimpse of some of their artist friends in this short video created by the Indianapolis Museum of Art: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZsqd-OgKhE

Herb is the negotiator and talker; Dorothy remains more quiet. He likes to study and analyze art, Dorothy prefers to intuit her decision and move on. He enjoys building breadth in a collection by an artist and she picks across the art spectrum.

Despite their different styles, the Vogels still continue to buy, based on personal values of what they like, on their definition of "beauty" and ultimately what they want to own. Naturally they are also practical buyers; they have to be able to afford the art and it has to fit in their apartment. Not that they have income issues.

Although they are both retired, they have anticipated benefits from their jobs as well as an annuity from The National Gallery of Art in appreciation of their donation. So their apartment was only temporarily void of art work after the Gallery packed it, and they have been avidly collecting again.

The documentary titled Herb and Dorothy was created by writer-director Megumi Sasaki who tells their story in a way that is personal and public, serious and funny, and totally engaging with scenes ranging from Dorothy's shopping at the Apple store for a mac to the huge vans carrying their art to The National Gallery so 50 museums in 50 states can provide exhibitions of pieces in this collection.

Enjoy the traiier http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vma2T5luy08

Sasaki says:

"From the beginning, my intention was to make something other than a so-called "art film." I wanted to capture how these two ordinary people accomplished the extraordinary in the field of art collecting. The film is about the power of passion and love, and a celebration of life.

The story of Herb and Dorothy Vogel is unique not only because of their avant garde vision and discernment as collectors, but also their love and dedication. It is through their loving partnership that the viewer truly experiences this remarkable story.

The Vogels' message is also about access. Art is not limited to the elite few. You don't have to be wealthy or an art school graduate to enjoy art.

If you are interested in collecting art, you don't have to follow trends or others' advice, just listen to your own voice. Trust your eyes and instinct. Simply take the time to look, look and look.

In today's world, where art is treated as another commodity and a work's investment value takes precedence over its artistic value, Herb and Dorothy offers us an important question: What is it to appreciate and collect art?

My fortunate encounter with these beautiful people has changed my view of, and appreciation for, art and life."

To read more from Judith: Therapy Times: Handcraft kits on the left column

Counting Calories is the First Step

Mon, 27 Apr 2009 17:58:59 -0400

If you want to lose some weight, I know one sure-fire method.

First thing in the morning, every morning--stand in front of a
mirror and jog in place for one hour. I guarantee you'll lose
weight--probably a lot of weight.

Yeah, I know, not too many people can do this--and it would be terribly boring if you could.

Fortunately, there's a million better ways to lose weight. And then
again, it all boils to one central truth. The only real way to really
lose weight is to consistently burn off more calories during the day
than you consume.

If you want to keep if off though, it's best to lose weight gradually over a
long period of time. Starving yourself on some stupid diet or jogging in place for an hour
every morning might result in tremendous short term results. But sooner
or later you'll go back to your old habits--and subsequently back to your old fat self.

The people I know who have successfully lost weight and maintained their new weight have one thing in common. They
count calories.

Counting calories is the only way to really know if you are making
progress and it has an added benefit. When you count calories you
learn a tremendous amount of good things about the foods you eat, and about the exercises you do or don't do.

You suddenly have a
consciousness that keeps you from over-indulging and keeps you jogging, or swimming, or whatever.

When it comes to counting calories there are a number of good, free
calorie trackers you can use on your computer or smart phone.

One of the best, non-commercial services is caloriecount from
About.com, the url is http://caloriecount.about.com Once you set up your
account, which is a bit time consuming but worth it, you can keep track
of the calories you consume daily through the food log and also keep track of
the calories you burn through the activity log. There is also a nifty nutrition report which will tell you what
percentage of the food you eat is fat, carbohydrates, or protein.

What I like best about the About.com site are the online support groups
you can join, and the associated blogs and information sites. It's really a complete program.

I also like the simple calorie counter widget from LabPixies which I
have added to my iGoogle health page. Totally intuitive and easy
to use...you can find it at http://www.labpixies.com It also works on
personalized Yahoo pages and there is a really cool toolbar you can
download to add to your browser. All for free.

One of the best commercial services is FitDay, http://www.fitday.com
which several of my friends use. It has all the features of the
About.com site and for some people it is more user friendly. However,
unless you purchase the "premium" service for $64.95 a year, you find
yourself bombarded with messages to buy things.

There are also several iPhone apps for this.

Whichever one you might choose, I think that just by counting calories
you'll soon find yourself on a workable path to reduce or maintain body
weight. The details about what you eat or how you exercise will
follow.

Counting calories is the first step.

To read more of Dave's posting, go to: www.my-wellness-coach.com

Please Pass the Kelp!

Wed, 08 Apr 2009 05:59:51 -0400

The conventional wisdom is the vast majority of us get enough iodine in our diet so we don't have to worry about iodine deficiency. A few years ago this might have been true because conventional table salt is fortified with about 40 mcg of iodine per gram and heavens knows, we all ate a lot of salt.

Today, however, people eat less salt and many of us don't use table salt. Instead we use sea salts or kosher salts which are not fortified, plus many of us eat soy or soy products such as soy protein isolate which is found in processed foods. Soy has been shown to actually inhibit thyroid synthesis. If you eat soy, you need more iodine.

What does iodine do, you may wonder. The answer is iodine stimulates the thyroid gland to manufacture a hormone called thyroxine. This essential hormone regulates metabolism in the efficient burning of calories. In children it regulates growth and development.

A deficiency in iodine leads to a condition called hypothyroidism, the symptoms of which include fatigue, weakness, lethargy, weight gain, depression, memory problems, constipation, dry skin, intolerance to cold, coarse and thinning hair, brittle nails and sometimes a yellowish tint to the skin.

If you have some of these symptoms and are worried about having an iodine deficiency you can ask your doctor to test your iodine levels via a urinalysis test. Or you can order a home testing kit from Medicalhometesting.com for $39.95.

Personally, I don't think I have an iodine deficiency, but hypothyroidism is a very slow developing disease and not one I want to ever deal with. So, as a preventative measure, I take a "super kelp" supplement. Available at most retail or online vitamin outlets, these pills are cheap. I paid less than $5 for 250 daily tablets, which are small and contain 250 mcg of iodine (the RDA is 150 mcg).

A few people report that kelp supplements can aggravate existing thyroid problems so you need to pay attention to any changes you feel if you follow my path by taking kelp supplements. And if you have an immune deficiency you need to check with your doctor first.

My only concern, though, is whether or not 250 mcg's is enough. A Harvard thyroidologist, Dr. Robert Utiger, thinks the RDA should be increased to 300 to 400 mcg.

To read more of Dave's postings or to subscribe to his blog click here.

Makoho--Simple Exercises You Can Do Before Bedtime

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 13:54:54 -0400

My friend Bob Thomas recently told me about a Japanese form of exercise called "Makoho" or "Makko-ho" which consists of four stretching exercises designed to rejuvenate the legs, align the hips and spine, stimulate blood flow, "sensitize the nervous system," and increase flexibiltiy.

Because you only need to do each exercise one time, holding it for about a minute, the whole set can be completed in about five minutes. I have found this to be an excellent routine to do just before going to bed. And it really helps me relax so I can quickly go to sleep.

I'm not quite flexible enough to do Makoho to the fullest extent but I'm fairly sure I'm still getting the benefit and I've already seen some progress. The secret seems to be to relax, breath deeply and just let you body weight take you deeper into the stretches.

Here's a great animation that will show you how: Makoho

Dave Bunnell, who is ELDR's Editor-in-Chief, is also a Wellness Coach. You can read more about this at My-Wellness-Coach.com.

When Creative Success Comes Later in Life

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 11:22:37 -0400

Some have struggled for years in jobs, others have followed a quiet creative life and many have tenaciously held on to their entrepreneurial spirit. Yet success found them later in life. When you have dreams of something beyond your present experience, patience is your biggest friend.

Here are some examples:

Anna Mary Robertson "Grandma" Moses was in her 70s when she began painting scenes of her rural life in upstate New York. This self-taught artist, mother and widow became one of the most famous American folk artists of the 20th century and continued painting in her 90s..

Louise Nevelson was in her 50s when she sold her work to three New York City museums and now her art can be seen internationally in over eighty public collections. Shortly before her 60th birthday, she became President of the Artist's Equity New York chapter which was the first of many art leadership positions she would attain.

When she was just months shy of her 50th birthday, Julia Child collaborated on her first French cooking book, a two-volume set titled Mastering the Art of French Cooking. Soon after, she promoted her book on television and that catapulted her overnight sensation in the culinary world.

Colonel Sanders of finger lickin good chicken fame, had a difficult start in life but early on realized he had a creative cooking talent. However it was not until he was in his 60s that he started KFC and became a millionaire.

Up until the age of 40, devoutly religious Anton Bruckner, composed music solely for the Catholic Church. Then a meeting with Wagner turned his life around and he began to compose symphonies of epic proportion. He was working on his great Symphony No. 9 when he died at 72.

Elliot Carter has received media attention at age 100. A review from The New York Times music critic was in praise of his latest, centenarian work, Interventions, describing it as "lucidly textured, wonderfully inventive, even impish. This was the work of a living master in full command."

Laura Ingalls Wilder wrote about her family's life in the 1870s and 1880s in the acclaimed The Little House on the Prairie series of books for children. She published her first book at the age of 65.

Harry Bernstein was in his 90s when he decided to write his memoirs after his wife of 67 years died. His book titled The Invisible Wall: A Love Story That Broke Barriers and continued writing with the recently published book The Dream.

Louis Kahn, a Russian immigrant, was an important architect of the 20th century. He created his first important piece of architecture, the Yale University Art Gallery, when he was in his 50s and continued to design notable academic buildings.

As jobless architect during the Depression, Alfred Mosher Butts invented Scrabble which became the most popular word game in the world. He did not realize success of the game until his early 50s when Macy's Chairman placed a large order and promoted it.

Charles Darwin was 50 years old when he published his complete theory of evolution in On the Origin of Species which sold out the first day it was released and subsequently had six editions. He continued to write for at least 10 more years (eg. The Descent of Man).

André Kertész was born in Hungary and after years in France photographing artists, he immigrated to the US. Now remembered as an eminent photojournalist, his career vacillated until, at the age of 70, he had a solo show at the Museum of Modern Art and subsequently in galleries all over the world.

This is a short list of many people in a variety of creative venues who pursued their passion and realized success at age 50 and beyond. Their achievements took many paths, twists and turns, and surely moments of self doubt.

Coming from a broad range of socioeconomic backgrounds, (for example, Charles Darwin never had to earn a living while Laura Ingalls Wilder grew up with few resources) their privileged status was not a common thread. But I believe that these late bloomers all share an exceptional ability to persevere, a brilliant talent that would not lay quiet, a set of good genes and a stable environment. They have enriched our lives as a result of their determination and unwavering spirit and they challenge those who believe that old age is simply a negative consequence of living.

Henry David Thoreau:

I have learned, that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.

To read more from Judith: Therapy Times: Handcraft kits on the left column

Old Tucson Studios: the “Old West” – Hollywood Style

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 11:11:59 -0400

I grew up spending my Saturdays at movie matinees.

One of my favorite genres was the "western." As an adult, I was hooked on western TV series like "Bonanza," "Cheyenne," "Maverick" and "Wagon Train." That's why it was such a hoot for me to recently visit Old Tucson Studios in Tucson, Arizona.

Martin Sandler

Old Tuscan Street Scene

This nostalgic tourist attraction consists of 75 buildings set on 320 acres of location sets between Tucson Mountain Park and Saguaro National Park. What you see is a complete western town, although some of the buildings are facades. This was the setting for a plethora of movies and TV series that took place in the Old West.

Old Tucson Studios began in 1939, when Columbia Pictures built a replica of 1860 Tucson for the filming of "Arizona," starring William Holden and Jean Arthur. More than 350,000 adobe bricks were used in constructing the dusty old town, which continues to be used as a filming location. There's actually an O.K. Corral here!

It is mind-boggling how many movies were filmed here. They include "Hondo," "McClintock" and "Rio Bravo" starring John Wayne; "Gunfight at the O.K. Corral" starring Kirk Douglas and Burt Lancaster; "Hombre" starring Paul Newman; "Cannon Ball Run II" starring Burt Reynolds; "Tombstone" starring Kurt Russell; "The Quick and the Dead" starring Sharon Stone and Russell Crowe.

TV series filmed here include: "Gunsmoke," "Have Gun Will travel," "The High Chaparral," "The Big Valley," "Bonanza" and "Little House on the Prairie." The mountain overlooking Old Tucson Studios is Golden Gate Peak, probably the most filmed mountain in westerns. The buildings along Main Street were often "recycled."

The Mission, built in 1939 for the movie "Arizona," was remodeled for use in "Tombstone." The hotel used in "Winchester 73," a 1950 movie starring James Stewart - with a then-unknown Rock Hudson - was used in "The three Amigos" with Steve Martin and Chevy Chase. The 1872 Reno locomotive appeared in thirty movies. The telegraph office is notable because Ronald Reagan entered it in "The Last Outpost," a 1951 movie.

Martin Sandler

Arresting Samantha

Bob Quesnette, head of security at the studios, struts around town while dressed as the town marshal, and pretended to "arrest" my 12-year-old granddaughter, Samantha, in front of the saloon. For fun, I and my grandchildren Andrew and Alyssa voluntarily "locked" ourselves inside an Old West jail cell on display on dusty Main Street.

My grandkids can't appreciate the movie history echoing throughout Old Tucson Studios, or the western history chronicled inside the studios' museum, but they did enjoy panning for gold in a trough, rifle-shooting at pretend targets, lunching at Big Jake's, an on-site eatery, and watching the Can-Can dancers inside the Grand Palace Saloon.

Other amusements include an Old Tucson Studios Historic Tour via a train that ambles around the facility; a stunt show; an exhibit of costumes worn in episodes of "The Big Valley" and "Little House on the Prairie," and costumes worn by Clint Eastwood, Frank Sinatra and other performers in movies they filmed here.

Old Tucson Studios confirms that those vintage westerns were make-believe, but for the kid inside me, they sure were magic. Contact Old Tucson Studios at (520) 883-0100.

Give Me My Black Garlic--Please!

Thu, 26 Mar 2009 07:43:41 -0400

For years I've known regularly eating garlic or taking a garlic supplement may provide many health benefits. Garlic is a natural remedy for lowering high blood pressure and high LDL cholesterol while raising the level of HDL (good) cholesterol. It may be effective for combating atherosclerosis and it definitely contains a big dose of antioxidants such as vitamin C, selenium, germanium, manganese, zinc, calcium and different proteins.

I don't believe the claim that garlic will prevent cancer, but I'm quite certain when consumed on a daily basis it will strengthen your immunity system, which is justification enough for me to take it seriously. The problem is garlic pills give me gas and while I like garlic in food I don't want to eat it every day.

I recently discovered the answer to my dilemma while waiting in line at the checkout counter at Berkeley Bowl, which is Berkeley's great homegrown grocery store. Positioned to be one of those last second purchases you make was a bunch of sandwich bag sized packages of something I had never heard of or seen before--Black Garlic.

I picked up a package and read that the claim that Black Garlic is sweet and soft with a hint of garlic flavor, and more importantly "without smell." Costing around $3.50 for four heads of garlic, I could see that it is dry, brown and flaky looking--not very appetizing but what the heck, I decided to give it a try.

Once I was home and before putting the groceries away, I dug out the package, opened it and peeled away the dry skin to reveal a charcoal black garlic clove that was slightly moist and soft to the touch. I popped into my mouth. It tasted sweet, almost like molasses, with a hint of tamarind and it was easy to chew.

Wow, I thought, this is delicious. And the marketing message on the package was no lie--Black Garlic is odorless and will not give you halitosis. It is sticky though, tiny pieces can lodge in between your teeth much like raisins.

I've been eating a clove of Black Garlic almost every morning since and I hope to continue doing this but worry about being able to find it as I haven't seen it at any other food stores.

It turns out that the particular Black Garlic I'm eating was "invented" by a Korean-American named Scott Kim who has developed a high-heat fermentation process that turns garlic heads from Korea into Black Garlic in 30 days. Mr. Kim has applied for a patent and currently his company in Southern California is the only supplier.

Whether or not Black Garlic existed before he came along is debatable. Some people think it is an ancient Asian dish which was previously fermented over a period of years in earth jars that were buried in the ground. I've search around the Internet and haven't found anything to verify this or not.

Also, there is a claim that during the fermentation process, a naturally occurring antibiotic and anti-fungal found in garlic called "Allicine" is turned into "S-Allycysteine" which is water soluble and far easier for the body to absorb. Black Garlic supposedly has twice the antioxidant power of regular garlic.

It gets more interesting. Chefs have discovered it. Eric Ripert of New York's top rated seafood restaurant, Le Bernadin, uses it to garnish monkfish and it has made an appearance on both Top Chef and Iron Chef television shows. I tried shaved pieces of Black Garlic on deviled eggs and it was really delicious.

To learn more about Black Garlic and more importantly, how to order it or where to buy it, you can check out Mr. Kim's website, aptly named blackgarlic.com.

And if you'd like to read more, here's an interesting article which even includes a recipe for Black Garlic with Scalaps: Aged Black Garlic: A New Superfood?

To read more health and longevity articles from Dave Bunnell: my-wellness-coach.com

Do You Have to Eat a Fat Juicy Steak to get Enough Protein?

Sun, 08 Mar 2009 16:30:58 -0400

The other day I read that many nutritionists still think you cannot get enough protein without eating meat, fish, or chicken. Can this really be true, I wonder. I'm not a vegetarian myself but days go by when I don't eat any animal flesh. So, I decided to research this topic. How much protein do you need? Where can you get it if you are like me or if you are vegetarian or vegan. I found some interesting answers and developed a list of non-animal flesh protein sources.

How Much?

The National Academy of Sciences (NAS) has set the daily Recommended Dietary Allowances (RDAs) of protein for males, 19 years old and older, at 56 grams and for females, 14 years old and older, at 46 grams. Pregnant and lactating women require an additional 25 grams of protein per day for a total of 71 grams. Though not proven, athletes who are doing strenuous aerobic exercises may need extra protein. If you doing regular, strenuous resistant or weight-lifting exercises, your body is actually producing more of its own protein so you don't really need to be eating an extra amount.

Many nutritionist disregard all this because their conventional theory is the amount of protein a person needs is proportional to his or her weight. Their rule of thumb is the number of grams of protein you need is your body weight (in pounds) multiplied by 0.37. Thus, if you tip the scales at 170 pounds, you need to eat 63 grams of protein a day (170 x 0.37 = 62.9). Just to keep you from rummaging around for your calculator, here's a handy list to determine your protein needs based on your weight:

Body Weight Proteins (Grams)

110     41
120     44
130     48
140     52
150     55
160     59
170     63
180     67
190     70
200     74
210     78
220     81
230     85
240     89

How Many Grams in a Pound?

Before we go much further with this little exercise, it is useful to know how many grams are in a pound and the answer is: 453.592-let's just round this up to 454.

Now then, your average steak (T-Bone, Filet, Porterhouse, etc.) is about 25% protein. Thus, if you need 70 grams of protein a day, a 10-ounce steak will take care of all of this. (454/16=28 x 10 = 280 x 0.25 = 70) The fact is, anyone who eats meat, chicken or fish on a daily basis is probably getting enough protein when you add all the other sources and there are many.

However, if you were to rely solely on spinach, which is fairly high in protein for a vegetable, you'd need to eat 13 cups to get your 70 gram requirement and I'm talking boiled spinach not raw. Many vegetables contain protein, but just eating a variety of them as your only source will probably not add up to the minimum requirement. Add in some beans, lentils, nuts, and whole grains though, and things start adding up. Here's a list of protein rich foods not including meat, chicken or fish but some dairy products:

Food Serving Size     Amount     Protein
Cottage cheese       4 ounces     16 grams
Cheddar cheese      4 ounces      28 grams
Soybeans                 1 cup           29 grams
Mozzarella cheese   4 ounces      26 grams
Cow’s milk               1 cup             8 grams
Goat’s milk              1 cup             9 grams
Shitake mushrooms 8 ounces        5 grams
Black beans             1 cup            15 grams
Lima beans              1 cup            14 grams
Lentils                     1 cup            17 grams
Kidney beans          1 cup            15 grams
Pinto beans            1 cup             14 grams
Navy beans            1 cup           15 grams
Yogurt                     1 cup             12 grams
Tempeh                  4 ounces        20 grams
Tofu                       4 ounces          9 grams
Egg                                              1 5 grams
Oats                cooked 1 cup          6 grams
Tomato                                     1 1.5 grams
Pumpkin seeds       ¼ cup    8.5 grams
Peanuts                   ¼ cup           9.5 grams
Almonds                  ¼ cup              7 grams
Mustard greens        1 cup              3 grams
Spinach                    1 cup              5 grams
Romaine lettuce      2 cups             2 grams
Mushrooms       5 ounces            4 grams
Asparagus             1 cup              4.5 grams
Broccoli                 1 cup              4.5 grams
Swiss chard             1 cup               3 grams
Collard greens         1 cup               4 grams
Cauliflower             1 cup               2 grams
Brussel sprouts        1 cup              4 grams
Miso                     1 ounce             4 grams
Turnip greens         1 cup             1.5 grams
Green beans           1 cup             2.5 grams
Cabbage                 1 cup              1.5 grams
Squash                     1 cup            1.5 grams
Garlic                     1 ounce           1.5 grams

If you need 70 grams of protein and you're a vegetarian you could easily get this amount by eating 4 ounces of cheddar cheese, 1 cup of blacks beans, a cup of yogurt, 2 eggs and 1 serving of broccoli. If you're a vegan, it's a bit more complicated, but not entirely impossible-1 cup spinach, 4 ounces tofu, 1 cup lentils, 1 tomato, 1 cup oatmeal, ¼ cup almonds, 1 cup squash and 4 ounces of tempeh. Without the tempeh, however, you'd need to add about 5 other sources!

Of course, it is all more complicated than what I've presented so far. Protein is a complex molecule comprised of a combination of different amino acids, and not all proteins contain all of the amino acids. Eight of these are refered to as "essential" because your body cannot manufacture them on its own. The others are "nonessential" for the opposite reason.

You can get all of the essential amino acids by eating a variety of vegetables, beans, whole grains and nuts or by eating meat,chicken or fish.

To read more on this topic, here's a good interview with a Tufts University nutrition scientist.

Creative Resilience in Difficult Times

Thu, 05 Mar 2009 11:42:44 -0500

Yes, it’s tough out there and the wind has not shifted yet. Since there is no economic weather forecast that is reliable, we have to accept this financial debacle and find ways to continue to manage our lives creatively and successfully.

It would be great if there was a magic potion to clear the negative fumes but our resilient attitude will be our best tool. Maintaining your dignity and optimism and building a personal well of happiness is important.

Ian Thiermann at age 90 lost all of his retirement savings, over $700 thousand dollars, in the Madoff scheme but refuses to dwell on the negative. He has launched himself again after 25 years of retirement and now works for $10 an hour, 30 hours a week, as a greeter at a local grocery store where he was a regular customer.

This initiative was made possible by Ian’s positive attitude and acceptance as
well as the smarts of the store management to recognize the value of
inspiration to others. Ian and his wife refuse to be depressed; instead they
are focused on gratitude for the support of friends and family around them.

How are artists responding? Brooklyn artist Geoffrey Raymond is 55 years old and, less than 2 years ago, the former PR executive reinvented himself by seizing the Wall Street collapse to generate a new
business. He paints oversized portraits of fallen CEOs and then positions
himself with his work outside their headquarters. He offers Sharpie markers to
those passing by to write their comments on the canvas; employees get a colored
marker and an unaffiliated person gets a black one.

Geoffrey has painted portraits of Richard Fuld (Lehman Brothers), James Cayne (Bear Stearns), Hank Greenberg (AIG), Rupert Murdoch (News Corp) and others to capture people’s
attention and give them a place to vent their thoughts. Not surprising this has
also captured the attention of the media as well as buyers on eBay where his
paintings sometimes start at an opening bid of $5,000. And there is a report of
a well heeled employee with a strong sense of humor paying $10,000 for a
portrait right there on the street.

An economy meltdown is hard to visualize but artists Marshall Reese and Nora Ligorano created just that. The ECONOMY ice sculpture called mainstream meltdown certainly provokes conversation. Purposefully staged in New York City on 10/29, the 79th anniversary of the
stock market crash, it had a pristine elegance in its 1600 pounds of ice that
measured 15 to 20 ft across and about 5 feet high. Yet it was doomed; it could
not last 20 hours and was an economy meltdown disintegrating right before your
eyes.

The economy is down but community service is up. Doing good is becoming trendy. There has been a recent rise in nonprofit start ups, a new surge of interest in volunteerism and an increase of applications to work at nonprofits.

People are stirred to reach out and infuse positive energy in a negative environment. It is difficult for a young person graduating college to look for a job when the market is weak
and competition is strong. That situation has stirred some to take a strategic
leap and join the Peace Corps upon graduation because they will learn a lot,
give a lot and by the end of their two year assignment hopefully the economy
will have improved.

Even corporations whose stock prices have tanked realize the value of community service from an inside and outside perspective. It feels good to the people making a difference and it looks good to the community and
to the public. According to the January 16, 2009 Verizon Press Release, “In
2008, Verizon employees volunteered more than 607,000 hours to 5,169 nonprofit
organizations. The Verizon Foundation, the philanthropic arm of Verizon,
supports employee volunteerism by awarding a $750 grant to a nonprofit organization when a Verizon employee volunteers 50 hours or more to the organization during the year.”

At Civic Ventures, their studies find that “Half of all Americans age 50
to 70 want work that helps others. A full 50 percent are interested in taking
jobs now and in retirement that help improve quality of life in their
communities.”

Heather Gee, Vice President for Development and Donor Services at Women’s Philanthropy Network in Philadelphia says that the group of volunteers at a recent event believe that “..women who have a common interest to give back to the community will make
this world a better place and really create positive change. They believe in
the power of women working together to change lives and save lives.”

In this difficult time, it is important to realize one’s own strength and resources to change internally and to give externally. Creative resilience is not an option, it is a necessity.

"Be the change
that you want to see in the world."

--Mahatma Gandhi

To read more from Judith:

Therapy Times: Handcraft kits on the left column
http://www.therapytimes.com/content=0602J84C489E8494406040441

BEAUTY IN MUNICH: BAVARIA’S CULTURAL CAPITAL

Tue, 03 Mar 2009 19:00:12 -0500

Remember Sid Caesar, Imogene Coca, Howie Morris and Carl Reiner on TV’s “Your Show of Shows?” In one classic skit, they portray mechanical Bavarian figures on a gigantic clock who suddenly revolve in the wrong direction, bump into each other and smack each other with hammers.

I stood beneath Munich’s Neo-Gothic City Hall on Marienplatz, the city’s central square. I peered up at the Glockenspiel tower and thought about that comedy skit. The crowd cheered as the Glockenspiel’s 43 bells rang, and knights – part of the clock’s 32 life-size mechanical figures -- jousted on horseback. The locals revere their Glockenspiel.

I know about many of Europe’s emperors, monarchs and kings, but knew nothing of Germany’s early rulers (electors) until I visited Munich’s exquisite royal palaces. Munich, the capital of the Free State of Bavaria, is rich with gorgeous architecture (from centuries-old churches to wondrous palaces), intriguing history and museums and artistic venues that rightfully make it Germany’s cultural capital.

The electors’ palaces are fabulous. Munich’s 130-room, 10-courtyard Residenz, a former medieval castle built in 1358 and home to Bavaria’s rulers, has a tunnel-shaped Antiquarium room

Martin Sandler

Antiquarium at The Residenz

decorated with stunning ceiling frescoes and rows of marble busts, but there is more opulence at Nymphenburg Palace, the summer residence of the Wittelsbach electors. Here, a central mansion links to open arcades, pavilions and galleries.

It was here that King Ludwig I created his Gallery of Beauties – women he bedded and/or admired for their beauty. Their portraits hang on the walls. One portrait is of the infamous Lola Montez, whose affair with beguiled Ludwig drew the public’s ire.

Successor King Ludwig II admired King Louis XIV of France, so Ludwig II modeled his Royal Palace of Herrenchiemsee (New Palace) after Versailles. The palace’s State Staircase is an absolute decorative marvel; the Rococo-style Great Hall of Mirrors, which was lit by 1,800 candles, is lavishly exquisite. Ludwig II was deemed insane. In 1886, at age 22, he drowned; Rumors that he was murdered remain unconfirmed.

The English Garden (Englischer Garten) was Europe’s first public garden. It dates to 1789 when Elector Carl Theodor converted his riverside hunting grounds into a public park. It’s bigger than New York’s Central park and contains a Greek temple, Chinese pagoda with 7,000-seat beer garden, Japanese tea house and paths studded with gorgeous blooms and sixty bird species that had me snapping pictures non-stop with my camera.

Munich’s beergartens are where I found scores of happy and friendly faces as Bavarian-clad musicians played and people forked down sausages at picnic tables. The Viktualienmarket, a bustling outdoor market with produce and bread stalls and a maypole and fountains, also adds festivity to the urban landscape.

Munich swells with art and science museums, including the Glyptothek, an impressive neo-Classical-style museum of art and antiques. The city has its own ballet, symphony, opera, and film festival, and a new Jewish museum that is helping visiting adults and schoolchildren to understand the Nazi era and why it must never happen again.

There are a few quiet reminders of Hitler’s Munich, such as an empty lot where Nazi HQ once stood, and an-ultra-modern synagogue that replaces the one Hitler ordered demolished so that he could have a better view of the city, but this is overshadowed by Munich’s wonderful shopping, dining and cultural venues. It’s a beautiful, festive city.

Relating with Song

Wed, 28 Jan 2009 13:23:28 -0500

“Call me Helen”.

That’s likely the opening words that University of Pennsylvania medical students will hear at their first day of class in Microbiology.

Dr. Helen Davies, 83, is a living legend for her brilliance, creativity, engagement in social issues as well as her personal warmth and compassion. She has won a staggering number of prestigious teaching awards including the 2006 Alpha Omega Alpha (AOA) Robert J. Glaser Distinguished Teacher Award, Penn’s Lindback Award for Distinguished Teaching, was named fellow of the American Association for the Advancement of Science and was the first woman to receive the American Medical Student Association’s National Excellence in Teaching Award in 2001. As if all of her accomplishments are not amazing enough, she has developed a reputation for song.

Not any song. Helen develops special lyrics to popular tunes to help her students remember information they need to learn in their course of study. New lyrics attached to the Battle Hymn of the Republic will trigger facts about bacteria, carefully chosen words will keep memories fresh about leprosy sung to the tune of Yesterday by the Beatles, herpes facts will be sung to Sound of Silence, and congenital infections will be tuned to I Will Survive.

With her energy and passion, Helen continues to garner the dedication and respect from colleagues and students every day. Many students have returned to visit and, after years away, some can still remember those special songs that helped them succeed in remembering so many scientific details.

Age seems to urge the need to sing. The Larks of Philadelphia is a group of 14 female singers between the ages of 50 and 70. Initially organized as a Junior League (JL) opportunity, it now encourages others to join who are not affiliated with JL. The women are dedicated and rehearse every week throughout the year, including summer. Their performances range from 2 half-hour back-to-back "cheer & carol" fests performed every Wednesday morning in December at area nursing homes, to longer programs of Jazz, Swing and Motown, and performed throughout the year. By joining with professional musicians for a concert at least once a year, they maintain a high level of musical excellence and perform madrigals and motets in addition to the modern foot-tapping rep.

Anjali Gallup-Diaz is the Musical Director of the Larks; she started singing with them in 2001 and became Director in 2003. She says, “While we certainly enjoy the heady experience of singing with pros for an alert and appreciative audience, the most rewarding moments of our performances often occur in Alzheimer-patient wards. When we belt out "All that Jazz" from the musical "Chicago" and I hear patients humming along, my heart soars. When we sing "Peace on Earth" - which we always do while holding hands with audience members - and an elderly resident, who hasn't spoken in weeks, mouths the words while staring into my eyes, my heart melts. There is no question in my mind that Music affords humans (and maybe our fellow animals, too) the surest and most direct means of communication. I live for those moments when people shed their inhibitions and break into song!”

Singing is a special way of communicating. The words and the music in tandem are creative vehicles of expression. It also has a therapeutic healing effect that has been proven in many studies and is being aggressively studied by professionals in the medical field. It can reduce heart and respiratory rates and provide mental relaxation. Victor Sonnino, a neurosurgeon, can visualize the melodic sound travels in the brain and has treated patients successfully with music. Passionate about opera which is the coupling of song and lyrics to convey a story, he is actively involved in promoting the value of music as a health tonic and an important part of the entire body wellness plan.

The therapeutic value of singing goes beyond the social relational aspects. It promotes improved breathing and posture and has been proven to reduce stress and anxiety and therefore has both physical and creative benefits. Voice tutor Chloe Goodchild, has used singing as therapy in a high-security prison in New York and one of her students is helping women impacted by the Kosovo war to share songs with women in Northern Ireland. Goodchild says: 'Singing can cut through personal history and get right to the heart of the matter and to the soul of who you are.'

Henry Van Dyke, writer, poet, essayist, said:

“Use what talents you possess; the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best.”

To read more from Judith:

Therapy Times: Handcraft kits on the left column
http://www.therapytimes.com/content=0602J84C489E8494406040441

Thoughts Upon Winning the Longevity Award

Mon, 26 Jan 2009 15:47:16 -0500

My well established habit of spreading the word about my old-age accomplishments, be they large or small, as well as alerting everyone to the wonderful media coverage that almost always follows, is hard to break - not that I try very hard - so prepare yourself for the latest.

In January every year, the International Anti-Aging Medical Institute holds a huge conference at the University of Minnesota here in Minneapolis.

Internationally known speakers discuss ongoing research and studies on anti-aging and progress being made in delaying the aging process, including Alzheimer's disease. Each year as the concluding event, two awards are made, one to a doctor for his outstanding achievements in this field and the other one is a Longevity Award to a Minnesota resident who has continued to stay active physically, mentally and socially well into his or her old age. With my usual modesty, I am proud to announce that I was this year's honored recipient of the Longevity Award.

In the unlikely event that a few of you might possibly enjoy the opening remarks of my acceptance speech, here they are: I LOVE being the recipient of this Longevity Award. I'm not sure I deserve it but in the eyes of my youngest great-granddaughter, I am the most qualified person for it in the whole wide world.

A few days ago, after carefully examining my withered old hands, she asked me how old I was. When I told her I'd be 95 in April, she responded, "Well, Pop, who's the oldest, you or God?" When I told her I was, that little squirt actually believed me. The beautiful sound of laughter that filled the auditorium broke the ice, relaxed me a bit and made it far less intimidating and scary to be up there on that stage talking to that huge gathering of brilliant professors, doctors and researchers from around the world. What a wonderful relief to finish that speech without making a blubbering dunce of myself.

Thanks for listening.

Best wishes for the New Year.

Love Junkie: Hot Sex and Ruinous Relationships

Mon, 26 Jan 2009 11:18:31 -0500

Love Junkie by Rachel Resnick is a brave, compelling memoir/confessional of the author's decades of seeking love and finding chaos and hot sex with damaged men within destructive, degrading, dangerous relationships. I couldn't put this book down.

I've had my wild times in the past and made some bad choices, but I always loved my men caring and my sex gentle. Resnick made me hold my breath as she pummeled me verbally and emotionally with graphic tales of rough sex with damaged, controlling men -- men who filled her vagina without ever filling her desperate need to be loved and valued.

Rachel Resnick grew up with a mother who was a drunk and picked up strangers in bars, her 11-year-old daughter drawing on paper placemats until mom was ready to go home, the man-of-the-night following in his own vehicle so he could make a quick escape the next morning. Her father had left when she was four.

As a child, she admitted her crush on a boy who responded by punching her in the stomach and hissing, "Don't you ever come near me again, ever." She took that painful contact as proof that he was destined to love her, and pursued him. So went the story of her adult dating life, too.

Resnick's needy yearning ("a shadowy choke hold") drove her life and relationships from one wrong man to another. She would do anything to please a man and make him love her -- which of course drove him away or brought out the worst in him. She obsessively sent e-mail after e-mail to the man she craved: "If it took fifty e-mails of justifications and explanations, late-night drive-overs and I'm-sorry blow jobs, sign me up," she writes about one such obsession.

Other reviewers have described Love Junkie as a train wreck -- you know you should avert your eyes and keep going, but you can't help staring at every bloody detail. I never felt like a voyeur reading it -- I felt involved, a part of the story, wishing I could pull my friend Rachel away from her own need and the men who degraded her. I wanted to talk some sense into her, help her turn her life around, let her know that love is possible, but first she has to look inside and get help to repair the damage.

I'm relieved that she comes to this understanding herself, committing to a 12-step program for people who are out of control around sex and love. Love Junkie is riveting reading, highly recommended.

Joan
Price

http://www.joanprice.com/

Author of Better
Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty (Seal Press,
2006, http://www.joanprice.com/BetterThanExpected.htm )

Author of The
Anytime, Anywhere Exercise Book: 300+ quick and easy exercises you can do
whenever you want! (http://www.joanprice.com/books/aaeb.htm )

Join us -- we're
talking about ageless sexuality at http://www.betterthanieverexpected.blogspot.com

View
Joan discussing Better Than I Ever Expected at http://betterthanieverexpected.blogspot.com/2008/04/view-joan-price-discussing-better-than.html

Hear Joan's lively,
spicy podcast at http://www.sealpress.com/podcasts.php?play=9781580051521

Nothing Beats a Voyage of "Independence"

Mon, 26 Jan 2009 11:06:01 -0500

People who live on or near America’s west coast can take advantage of an unmatchable vacation treat. Cruise ships vie with each other to create an ultimate passenger experience, but Royal Caribbean Cruise Line has achieved the Wow! Factor by deploying its "Mariner of the Seas" to Los Angeles (as of February 22, 2009).

Martin Sandler

Pictured here is the Independence pool deck.

Mariner is the first Voyager-Class ship to sail from the West Coast. It offers 27 seven-night round-trip sailings to the Mexican Riviera: Cabo San Lucas, Mazatlan and Puerto Vallarta. More cheers: RCCL joined with Robert Mondavi, Beringer Blass Wine Estates and Niebaum-Coppola Estate Winery to expand its onboard Vintages wine bar, giving Mariner passengers access to affordable or rare wines.

I haven’t yet experienced Mariner of the Seas, but I recently returned from a round trip (from Fort Lauderdale) Western Caribbean cruise aboard Mariner’s sister ship, "Independence of the Seas," so I know these ships are…well…gorgeous. In one sea day, I can have a milkshake in Johnny Rockets diner, putt on the miniature golf course, attend a scrapbook workshop and wine tasting, get a massage and lounge by the three pools.

Martin Sandler

Independence Atrium

And Oh! the onboard amenities! An ice-skating rink and ice show, inline skating track, rock-climbing wall, basketball court, Broadway-style productions in the three-level Savoy theater, ten discos and lounges (some lively, some serene), fitness center and Spa, three-level dining room (with a “Sound of Music” theme), an Asian-fusion eatery called Jade, and two alternative restaurants, Chops Grille Steakhouse and Portofino.

Running 445 feet down the center of the ship, the Royal Promenade is longer than a football field. Interior guest rooms overlook the Promenade’s shops and restaurants, including a pub with Irish music, a Ben & Jerry’s, a café and a pizza parlor. I felt as though I were strolling a European boulevard, with “apartments” above.

Martin Sandler

English pub in Royal Promenade.

The street fairs and parades are festive: stilt-walkers, clowns, mimes, the “Gods of Mt. Olympus” and themed floats wander the Promenade. Count me among the spectators who gave a standing ovation to the ship’s ice show, “Freeze Frame,” celebrating music and dance of the ‘40s-‘70s, and performed by 12 champion skaters, including six from the Russian National Team.

Unlike Mariner, the Independence has a 32’-wide x 40’-long Flow-rider surf simulator, but both ships are ideal for family cruising, thanks to the youth activity programs for ages six months to 17 years, and a vibrantly-colored children’s waterpark. Of the three ports-of-call on Independence, (Belize City; Cozumel, Mexico; Costa Maya, Mexico), Costa Maya equals great family fun, thanks to vividly-costumed street dancers in the shopping square, and a small beach, both only a minute’s walk from the ship.

Amid the beauty of the Independence’s “floating staircases,” elegant décor and super-friendly/helpful staff and crew, I found only one negative about the ship: only two banks of elevators, prompting a lot of waiting, and a lot of walking to get from one end of the ship to the other. I wished for an escalator or even a “moving walkway” like the ones at airports. Nevertheless, a voyage of Independence (or Mariner) is a fabulous ride! ###

Irving Fields: Pianist

Thu, 18 Dec 2008 09:53:26 -0500

Irving Fields got his first break at 16, singing on “Amateur Hour,” the national radio show. He won first prize: $50 — a lot of money in 1932. “When I got back to our apartment in Brooklyn, my whole family was there, and I threw the money up in the air. Fifty one-dollar bills blowing in the air, a thrill for me,” he recalls.

Irving’s older sister Peppy, who had married to a man named Rosenfields and launched a singing career, hired her brother fresh out of high school as her accompanist. “She was a blues singer, shortened her name from Rosenfields to Fields, and became very successful,” Irving recounted. A beautiful woman, she told him, “Look, these guys hanging around the stage are bothering me. I want them to know that you’re my brother and if they get funny with me—”

Irving finished the sentence: “I’ll crack ‘em in the jaw." Grinning, she proposed that they become a brother and sister team: Peppy and Irving Fields, “and that’s how it happened. Later, when I went on my own, I became known as Irving Fields.”

Fields has made his living in show business ever since. After encountering Latin music in the ‘40s as a concert pianist on a cruise ship that docked in Havana and San Juan, “I went crazy, and I brought I back to America,” he recalls. His fusion of popular Yiddish melodies with Latin rhythms (think ("Mazeltov Merengue") inspired waves of imitators.

“Miami Beach Rumba” and “Managua, Nicaragua” were both on the Hit Parade, establishing Fields as a composer, and an arranger, and pianist. Since then he’s performed everywhere from Carnegie Hall with his trio to clubs and hotels around the world. You can hear him now, six nights a week, at Nino’s Tuscany on West 58th Street in Manhattan.

There have been good years and leaner ones. As Fields entered his 80s, he’d occasionally masquerade as his own manager when calling around for the next gig. “They’d say, ‘Irving Fields, Oh, he’s been around a long time, yeah I’ve heard him play. Gee, how old is he?'

'Oh, Mr. Fields, he’s about 65' — 'cause people said I always looked 20 years younger.

‘Oh yeah, really? He’s still around?’ I used to hide my age to get a job because I thought they wouldn’t hire me because I’m in my 80s,'" Fields explains. "They’d think, 'Well he can hardly walk, he can hardly play.' Now that I’m in my 90s I flaunt my age. I tell them how old I am, and I’m proud of it. And I play better than ever and I keep the people happy, and they’re happy with me.”

You can see Irving’s picture, and hear him telling this story, at http://www.sowhenareyougoingtoretire.com/?q=node/35

Ruby and Liberty Equal Serene Sailings

Thu, 11 Dec 2008 19:27:42 -0500

Between the accommodations, meals, entertainment and activities, a 2-night stay at a resort is expensive. Often costing less than a resort, a 2- to 3-night cruise getaway can offer more value. Everything is inclusive, and aside from the luxury and pampering, there are the stops at island ports.

Last month, because the prices and dates were right, Marty and I indulged in a 2-night “cruise to nowhere” on Ruby Princess, followed by a 7-night Caribbean cruise vacation aboard Carnival Liberty. The 3,070-passenger, 15-deck Ruby Princess sailed round trip from Fort Lauderdale, and it was an ideal, relaxing mini-escape for us.

This ship is a beauty. Our mini-suite included a full bathtub, walk-in closet, sofa and desk, mini-bar and two TVs. Our balcony was the largest we’ve seen on a ship. Boredom is a non-existent word on the ship.

Martin Sandler

Ruby Princess Atrium

Ruby’s piazza-style atrium features small-bite eateries and “street entertainers” – unicyclist, juggler, etc. – in addition to performances by a classical music trio.

Call it “dive-in movies.” This is the Movies Under the Stars outdoor movie theater (a huge LED screen) on the pool deck. Activities? Sure, thanks to trivia games, a 9-hole putting course, five pools, three main dining rooms, myriad cafes, sports court and jogging track, ScholarShip@Sea classes and a spa-inspired, adults-only outdoor relaxation area called The Sanctuary.

Many of the abundant commissioned paintings around the ship reflect scenes of Italy, and the quality of the artwork enhances the ship’s luxurious ambiance. This is a multi-million dollar collection that I think is surpassed only by the artwork I’ve seen on Holland America ships. The collection is only part of what makes Ruby Princess so pretty, but I wish I were as enthralled by the two alternative restaurants on this ship.

We dined the first night at Sabatini’s, which offers seafood specialties, but the service was lacking and the food was so-so. The second night, we dined at Crown Grill, where the food and service were much improved. Compared to other ships, Ruby’s cigar bar is tiny, but very impressive is the Wheelhouse Bar, which becomes an English-style pub on sea days.

Speaking of alternative restaurants, Harry’s, a steakhouse named for jeweler Harry Winston, is one of Carnival Liberty’s best attributes.

Martin Sandler

The Gold Dining Room in the Carnival Liberty

Decorated with lights that represent diamond bracelets and other gems, Harry’s offers top-notch service and fare. We loved the corned beef and pastrami sandwiches at the pool deck’s New York Deli, and savored the lobster and yummy soups served in the gold and silver dining rooms.

As Carnival Liberty took us from Miami to San Juan, St. Thomas and St. Marten, we marveled at perhaps the best production we’ve seen on any ship. Called “Around the World,” it features the Carnival dancers performing dances from all parts of the globe. Between the Can Can, masquerade ball, Flamenco dance, Irish step dance and more, we can’t recall seeing more gorgeous costumes or talented shipboard dancers.

This is only part of why, for us, cruising is the ultimate vacation.

- Roberta Sandler is an award-winning writer/author. Her newest book is A Brief Guide to Florida's Monuments and Memorials, published by University Press of Florida. She and her husband live in Wellington,
FL.

The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex

Thu, 11 Dec 2008 12:02:58 -0500

Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex by Mary Roach is the most entertaining -- and, in a madcap way, the most informative -- book I’ve read in years. Filled with the weirdness of both the procedures and findings of sex research, Bonk combines arcane details with amazing facts and research tools (e.g. the “penis-camera).

Regale your friends with anecdotes from this book, and you’ll be the life of the party – as long as the party is filled with open-minded friends who enjoy zany details about sex.

Mary Roach writes in a clever, often hilarious style, which makes her books a pleasure to read, whether she’s writing about cadavers (Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers ), the afterlife (Spook: Science Tackles the Afterlife), or, in this case, sex. My copy quickly became spotted with Post-Its as I read, marking passages I simply had to tell you about, but numbering an impossible 45 markers by the time I finished.

Here’s just a small sampling of the facts I learned:

Princess Marie Bonaparte (great-grand-niece of Napoleon) blamed her inability to orgasm during intercourse on the fact that her clitoris was three centimeters away from her vagina. She did her own research in 1924 with a ruler and interviews and discovered that “téléclitoridiennes,” women with more than 2.5 centimeters between clitoris and vagina, were incapable of orgasm during intercourse. So she employed a surgeon to relocate her clitoris. (No, sorry, it didn’t work for her.)

Women don’t like men’s cologne, according to their rate of vaginal blood flow. The scent of men’s cologne actually reduced vaginal blood flow, as did the smell of charcoal-barbecue meat. Oddly, what increased vaginal blood flow the most (by 13%) was a mixture of cucumber and Good’n’ Plenty candy. Hmmm.

[describing one of many sex machine inventions:] “The motor housing is the size of a lunchbox and is raised on one end, like a slide projector. A flesh-colored phallus on a stick slides quietly in and out. The erotic appeal seems limited. It would be like dating a corn dog.”

[describing another sex machine invention, called “Therapeutic Apparatus for Relieving Sexual Frustrations in Women Without Sex Partners”:] “At the base of the penial assembly was a wide, black, wiry cuff of fur-like or hair-like material. For the partnerless woman who wants not only the ultimate climax or orgasm, but also the feeling that she is having sex with a shoe buffer.”

You’ll learn about “uterine upsuck” in pigs and how Danish farmers increased their pigs’ fertility by sexually stimulating their sows to “upsuck” the semen better. Why it rarely worked to use an MRI to study couples having sex. How porn stars make extra money by having their orifices replicated into plaster casts which are then used for sex dolls. And what Mary Roach and her husband did in full view of scientists to further sex research.

Some of the most intriguing diversions are found in the footnotes. Did you know that Victorian gynecologists and urologists wouldn’t look at the nether parts of the women they were examining? Can you guess why men land in emergency rooms when they can’t remove their improvised cock rings? Or the strangest foreign objects that have been removed from rectums? (I can’t decide whether to vote for the frozen pig tail or the spectacles.)

I highly recommend Bonk for your own delight and as gifts for your sex-minded friends this holiday season.

[Read my interview with Mary Roach here.]

Joan Price

Author of
Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty (Seal
Press, 2006, http://www.joanprice.com/BetterThanExpected.htm)

Join us --
we're talking about ageless sexuality at http://www.betterthanieverexpected.blogspot.com

View Joan
discussing Better Than I Ever Expected at http://betterthanieverexpected.blogspot.com/2008/04/view-joan-price-discussing-better-than.html

Hear Joan's
lively, spicy podcast at http://www.sealpress.com/podcasts.php?play=9781580051521

ARE YOU A PENGUIN OR A PEACOCK?

Tue, 09 Dec 2008 18:08:19 -0500

Or an eagle? Or maybe a swan? Or what about a mockingbird?

BJ Gallagher Hateley and Warren Schmidt have written the fabulous book “A Peacock in the Land of Penguins; a Fable about Creativity and Courage”. It is charming and piercing, funny and poignant; a testimony to the beauty of being different in any organization and the struggle to gain a voice.

Penguins are metaphorically portrayed as corporate styled birds in an icy climate dressed formally and universally in black and white attire at all times. Outsiders are other birds who have different but noble intentions and, despite integration efforts, cannot succeed in the penguins’ insular clan type organization. Ultimately these distinct feathered beings find themselves in a new space that embraces their uniqueness and offers them the freedom to be who they are; explore and invent opportunities, share their wisdom, reflect on possibilities and dream their dreams.

Are you a penguin or a peacock? Do you find it easy and safe to conform to a structured environment or do you fan your beautifully colored feathers wide and strut to a different drummer? Can you really change who you are or do you even want to?

Many large organizations have seemed to clone their staff to maintain internal harmony. The invisible logic is that employee sameness will allow the wheels to turn year after year without the risky diversion of change or implementation of new ideas. But this creates staleness in a competitive climate and hostile game playing to the more industrious person with good ideas and intentions. Eventually creative individuals find their paths but it is not often an easy journey. There are some companies that value special strengths (creative industries and small businesses are more open than their corporate counterparts) and will realize the value of these special birds but many “exotic birds” will find solace in building their own business on their own terms.

It is a credit to large companies that realize the instructional value of this book and teach diversity training and mutual respect among employees. The corporate climate is not friendly to peacocks but then it harbors grudges against outsiders of all types. And yet, it is important for penguins and peacocks to learn, listen and accept differences in one another without molting feathers. It is a life lesson for everyone whether or not they are still in the workplace.

So how did B.J. realize the world of penguins and peacocks? Here's how she explains it in her own words:

I was much like the lead character…colorful and extravagant, noisy and messy, a bird who is difficult to ignore.

I was working at the Los Angeles Times in the late 1980's and early 90's; we held regular meetings of the executive and middle management groups to review circulation figures, assess advertising revenues, and plan new goals. These meetings were always the same: The president with all his vice presidents and directors would sit in the front row in the elegant auditorium, and the publisher began the meeting by introducing each of them. One-by-one they would pop up out of their chairs and turn to face the 200 middle managers in the rows behind them. They all wore dark suits, white shirts, and business ties; they were all about the same height, save one or two tall ones; and all but one were white males (the lone female penguin wore a dark suit and pearls). By all appearances, you would think they all went to the same barber and the same tailor!

One morning I was sitting in one of these meetings, watching these fellows, like so many jack-in-the-boxes popping up, one right after another. “Huh!” I thought to myself, “They all look like penguins.”

Then I looked down at myself. I was wearing my favorite Carole Little dress, a bright and bold floral, mid-calf, a bit flouncy (but very slimming). “What's wrong with this picture?” I asked myself. “I'm like a peacock in the midst of all these penguins!” I shook my head, wondering how this could have happened. How did I end up here? Thus the metaphor was born.

Hope is a Positive Force

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:46:49 -0500

Hope is the positive force that propels us forward. With hope, there is an expectation of something we want to happen. We use it everyday; waiting impatiently for a bus to come and hoping it appears in the next minute, caring for a sick friend and hoping that s/he will get better soon, enjoying an indulgence in sweets and hoping to regain will power tomorrow to resume dieting, etc. Mentally we allow ourselves to flex to the possibilities of change. We imagine and create scenarios to fill our needs and desires. Having the mental freedom to conceive and dream of these changes is an integral part of our creative thought processes. We give ourselves permission to dream a little so that we can subconsciously will an event, a person, an experience to change and make a wonderful difference in our lives.

Without hope, we’re relegated to the doldrums of life and open to helplessness, despair and depression.

With hope comes change and with change comes innovation. It is a simple flow chart. America captured this symbolically with the election of Barack Obama as our next President. We voted for “Change we can believe in” because we needed a new rudder to guide us safely through the current economic turbulence and other domestic problems. In support of Obama, the well known POP artist Robert Indiana at age 79, designed the sculpture HOPE as a graphic similar to his famous LOVE artwork (with the letter “O” on a diagonal). But what if Barack did not have hope? What if 2 years ago, with little money or endorsements and minimal support by the polls and pundits, Barack despaired and no longer believed that he could gain enough support of voters to be President? Fortunately his campaign mantra, the power of three affirmative words, “Yes, we can!” resonated
strongly across the nation and across political divides to bring victory. It was based on hope and not fear, on change and not status quo.

Hope is also a survival tool. In 2002, Laurie Johnson
survived a plane crash but lost her husband and young son in the accident. Left with a severely broken leg (femur), Laurie faced a long process of rehabilitation which included multiple surgeries and prolonged use of crutches. With physical and emotional struggles, she hoped that she could get back to her life prior to the accident. Bored with the dismal dull grayness of crutches, she and her sister started to play creatively with change. Their ideas ignited a new business that embraced crutches with fashion and comfort and LemonAid Crutches™ was born. Crutches and arm pads are now available in fun and elegant styles and provide valued comfort as well as visual pleasure.

Hope means replacing the old and choosing something new. It’s an opportunity for the heart and mind to flex
together creatively and be an explorer in an unknown land. It’s a voluntary challenge we pursue when convention no longer makes sense and the new road is like a beautiful untouched path of fresh snow.

Martin Luther King, jr. said:

"If you lose hope, somehow you lose the vitality that keeps life moving, you lose that courage to be, that quality that helps you go on in spite of it all. And so today I still have a dream."

This Holiday You Can Be Frugal AND Still Be Generous and Wonderful!

Tue, 25 Nov 2008 14:23:08 -0500

With the economy in a tailspin, financial worries all around us and the holidays approaching, how can we continue to give in the same way as we have in the past? With creative approaches, gift giving can still feel wonderful and generous. There are many ways to give joy and kindness to others without feeling impoverished. Remember that it is your thoughtfulness that is an integral part of gift giving and never hesitate to use plenty of colorful tissues and ribbons to make your gift look ultra fabulous!

CRAFTY WAYS: There are boundless opportunities to craft your gifts; some more expensive and time consuming than others. For frugal approaches, try the following:

Create a stack of greeting cards with your favorite rubber stamps and/or embellishments and tie the package with a festive ribbon. No stamps? Cut a potato in half lengthwise, carve it and dip it in paint and you have a stamp!
Sentiments are always strong so making a scrapbook page with personal items, quotes, poetry and photos, will be a sure hit!
Buy an inexpensive picture frame and for your special photo (maybe it’s you, or the recipient or a pet); with extra time you can decorate the
frame by gluing on some extra buttons you have stashed with your
other sewing notions.

RETHINK AND REUSE:

Take another look at disposables that would otherwise be in your
trash; it is likely that you can reuse them to make wonderful gifts.
With scraps of printed cotton and Modge Podge glue, I used a
decoupage technique to cover empty toilet paper rolls. The result?
Elegant napkin ring holders, decorated with fun trimming on one end, are always an attraction at my dinner table with guests!
Found objects can have multiple lives. I rescued a crushed car hubcap from the road to make a fabulous picture frame. The embedded dirt actually gave it a special and wonderful shadow effect.

SATISFYING A SWEET TOOTH:

Everyone loves homemade goodies. If you don’t enjoy baking
cakes or cookies from scratch, try using a mix; there are many
wonderful brands that will produce excellent results even for the
gluten free diet.
Another approach is to buy bags of colorful loose candy and layer
them in an inexpensive glass container with a lid. Tie a pretty bow
on the neck of the jar and it looks great!

SURPRISE BASKETS:

Gather beautiful fruits and make your own gift basket. To
make it extra attractive, place a paper doily in between the fruits
or a large one under each one. Another basket may be a collection of
travel size toiletries which you may have from hotel visits or
cosmetic bonus packs.
Add a special touch in the basket with a washcloth rolled up and tied with a ribbon and even a little miniature toy for fun! There are plenty of ideas that can fill your basket so just think of a theme and fill it up!

GREEN THUMB:

Buying a plant is usually affordable but you can also share a
plant that you have in your home. Fill a new pot with soil and
carefully separate part of your plant and repot it as a gift with a
special ribbon.
Want to get fancy? Take some acrylic paint and paint a pattern on the pot!

RECYCLED GIFTS:

We all have received gifts that we did not want, tried to look the other way
but graciously accepted with a smile and a thank you. These gifts
need to be recycled and given to those people who will enjoy and
appreciate them! Now is the perfect time to look in your closets, on
your shelves and through those storage bins to find gifts to recycle.
If you are scratching your head and not coming up with possible gift
recipients, donate it!
When the material world of gift giving still leaves you in a quandary,
consider ways to give of yourself.

YOUR-OWN-CERTIFICATE:

This is a fabulous way to give a gift of yourself! Print out
certificates for house cleaning, dog walking, car washing,
babysitting or any other service that you can provide that is valued
by the recipient.

VOLUNTEER:

Volunteers are an important part of our society. When you volunteer
and donate your time to an organization, you are giving to people in
need. This is truly a way to honor the spirit of the holidays by
supporting the organization or charity that helps others. If you do
not know who to contact or where to go, try http://www.volunteermatch.org for local opportunities.

We are living in extraordinary times and we are challenged to maintain
our positive sense of self. By giving to others and being remarkable
in our kindness to others, we can flourish and build a better society.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, the poet, has said:

“The greatest gift is a
portion of thyself”

Bill and Ruth Stein: Booksellers

Tue, 25 Nov 2008 05:18:10 -0500

Ruth Stein inspired this project. She’s my mother-in-law (more or less). She and Bill, her husband of 62 years, are sales reps for a bunch of book publishers. They work four days a week, driving from their apartment-cum-showroom in Manhattan to a split-level in Westchester every weekend. Occasionally, especially after a set of 14-hour days at a trade show, they admit to being pooped. More tiring, though, is fielding the perennial question, “So when are you going to retire?” Over dinner one night Ruth turned to me and said, “Why don’t you write about that?”

In an era when people didn’t get divorced and ladies didn’t work, Ruth’s mother left her husband when their daughter was four and worked full-time as a buyer for classy New York department stores like Henri Bendel and I. Magnin. Ruth’s working life began at 18, directing customers around Saks Fifth Avenue as one of the Saks Sextet. “We sat on the main floor in seersucker dresses and I earned $17 a week,” she recalls with evident pleasure. She and Bill met when she was 5 and he 8, and married upon his return from WWII, where he piloted a B17 bomber and survived being shot down and captured by the Germans.

Ruth’s entrepreneurial bent materialized early on. As a newlywed she invented and sold a card-table cover with a pocket for score pad and pencil. (The Steins remain formidable bridge players.) They had two kids, Bob and Patty, who when were six and three when their mother came down with polio. Once able to get around with crutches and a brace, Ruth got stir-crazy, “so Bill and I had an idea that we could improve the gifts that executives gave out at Christmas time.” She put a collection together and it soon got so big — “we had things like 200 ice buckets delivered to the back door” — that she rented a showroom on the second floor of the Hyde Park Hotel.

Ruth ran the store for ten years, until the rent doubled. She closed up shop. She got depressed. Bill had bypass surgery (a pioneer in 1976). Money grew tight. “There were times when we would actually take the bills and throw them up in the air and see whose landed face up, and we’d pay those,” she recalls. Bought out of an earlier business importing semi-precious stones, Bill had decided to become a sales rep because it required no capital. Panicked if he ran even five minutes late, Ruth declared, “If you’re going to continue doing this, I’m going to do it with you.”

That’s how they first teamed up, beginning with “kerchiefs, corncob pipes, some of the worst stuff you ever saw in your life,” as Ruth puts it. Building on contacts from her gift business, they started repping better stuff, narrowing it down to books in the late ‘80s and selling them to non-bookstore outlets like museums and gift shops — a niche they invented. Landing the Miss Piggy Calendar was their first big break. Then along came Where’s Waldo? Since then they’ve worked for so many publishers, including all the big players, that they’ve lost count and become legends in the industry.

Ruth is a genius salesperson, matching books she knows well with customers whose tastes and needs she really cares about. A steel-trap memory doesn’t hurt, and neither does having Bill managing the accounts in the room next door. The trait of Ruth’s that I most admire is enthusiasm. She’s never met a conversation she doesn’t want to be in on, and she loves her customers and her merchandise. “I get such a kick out of them,” she says, waving at the stacks of books that crowd every surface around her. A little later, “What makes a good day on the job is if I’m working with somebody who is enthusiastic.” Many customers have become friends, part of an ever-expanding social network.

The Steins are fortunate not only to have each other but to collaborate well. “We never, ever sat down and said, ‘You do this and I’ll do that,’” Bill comments. “It just evolved. Ruth became the sales part of the business and I became the backroom part.” It may have cut into their social life (no ladies’ lunches for Ruth), but it’s certainly brought them closer. “In the end, working with Bill has made all the difference,” says his wife. “If I’ve had a lousy day he knows why, and if he’s annoyed, I know it’s because somebody didn’t pay a bill. It’s fun doing it together.”

Not that they agree on everything. Because Bill’s physical mobility is seriously limited by war injuries and knee operations and Ruth’s by post-polio syndrome, they ask customers to come to their showroom. Bill feels they lost the Time/Warner account not long ago because of their age — specifically because the publisher wanted reps who’d make sales calls. “But that had nothing to do with our age,” Ruth counters. “We’ve earned the right to have people come to us. And people like seeing a multitude of publishers in one place instead of being interrupted in their stores 15 times. They can see the actual books, which makes sense, because the books we sell are not returnable.”

Ruth does acknowledge concern about ageism. “I keep thinking that if our publishers knew how old we were, they’d say, ‘My god, what are we doing hiring these people?’ It doesn’t seem to bother them, but it makes me nervous.” Customers, on the other hand, either don’t notice their age or get a kick out of it, and the Steins’ limited mobility isn’t an issue. (This post explains why the Steins see their disabilities as justification for working rather than retiring.)

The Steins aren’t closing up shop any time soon. As physical challenges have come to the fore, financial ones have receded, but the income still comes in handy. “I don’t have to think twice about whether I want to take my family out to dinner, or travel. That does not hurt one bit,” Ruth declares. Work, she says “keeps me out of mischief, keeps me thoughtful, keeps me active. I think we’ve always appreciated the things that we have been able to do.” So please, don’t ask when they’re going to retire. After all, as our standing jokes goes, they’ve got children to support!

About the Author: Ashton Applewhite is a Knight Fellow, a New York Times Fellow, and the author of "Cutting Loose: Why Women Who End Their Marriages Do So Well," a book about women who initiate divorce. Read more about work and old age on her blog: SoWhenAreYouGoingToRetire.

Discoveries Helping Me Move Through Grief

Fri, 21 Nov 2008 16:06:32 -0500

Robert died three months ago. Although this post has nothing directly to do with sex, so many of you have sent me compassionate emails that I'd like to share what I wrote to my online grief support group today:

I've been working hard at finding ways to create some semblance of balance and -- dare I say it? -- moments of joy in my life amidst the powerful grief that comes in waves and knocks me to the ground. I'd like to share some things that have worked for me, just in case any of them might be useful to some of you. Feel free to add to the list if you have something to share that has worked for you.

Problem: Out of control crying had reduced me to a crazy, quivering mess and sometimes lasted days without a break, intensified by not being able to sleep for more than 2 hours at a time. I felt physically and mentally ill from the ravages of grief.

Solution: Doctor prescribed an antidepressant (for "situational depression" for six months), a sleeping pill, and a counselor. The combination has brought me indescribable relief. I still grieve and sometimes feel like I'm pedaling through peanut butter, but at least the elephant has stopped kicking me in the chest and stomach.

Problem: I knew journaling would help, but my writing fingers felt paralyzed for the first two months -- did I write memories of Robert and talk to him in my journal, or did I write about ways I was trying to move on? The two seemed to cancel each other out.

Solution: I started TWO journals. In one, I write to Robert and remember the special things he/we did and said. In the other, I write about my steps towards creating a new life: making a new friend, insights from counselor and friends, little things that make me happy, if only for a minute. This has worked splendidly -- I write in one journal, then switch to the other.

Problem: Morning ritual was so special. After wonderful snuggling, Robert would say, "I'm going to make you coffee." He would get up, bring me the morning newspaper and coffee in bed. I would share something from the paper that might interest him, and sometimes he would just sit and watch me lovingly as I read, or he would go out to tend his garden. He painted a special bell (he was an artist) for me to ring when I wanted a coffee refill. It was a glorious and loving start to the day, and without him, mornings felt so empty.

Solution: Replace missing ritual with new one. I cancelled the newspaper subscription (don't even miss it). Now I get out of bed, make my coffee the way he used to, but I bring it to my favorite chair that looks out on the yard and I write in my journal while I sip.

Problem: My world was Robert. I did much independently, don't get me wrong, but he was the one with whom I walked , danced, went out to dinner and films, talked about everything.

Solution: I reached out to old friends and made new ones. I thought about people whom I liked and would like to know better. Several had extended invitations to me, but I wasn't ready. I contacted them and made walking dates and coffee or dinner dates. Now I have people I can do things with, and they understand when I get tearful.

Joan Price

http://www.joanprice.com/

Author of Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty (Seal Press, 2006, http://www.joanprice.com/BetterThanExpected.htm )

Join us -- we're talking about ageless sexuality at http://www.betterthanieverexpected.blogspot.com

View Joan discussing Better Than I Ever Expected at http://betterthanieverexpected.blogspot.com/2008/04/view-joan-price-discussing-better-than.html

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